Petunia - Ever since we met in that head-on car crash, I've
been dying to see you again. Meet me in Ward C, next to the
dialysis machine - Ted.
Fiona, I'll never two-time you again - John.
Brenda - Yours truly, madly, deeply, musically, weepingly,
ecclesiastically, paradigmatically, stereophonically, pan-
dimensionally, monotheistically - Jim
Mabel, I'll never two-time you again - John.
Florence - Spring is in the air, the cardboard flowers are
blooming (blooming awful) and purple cows are grazing in the
lush paper pastures. Can we bounce away together? - Zebedee.
Paul - they meant nothing to me, honestly! - John.
Edna - I can't stand the way you sexually molest pheasants, but
other than that you're alright. Scott.
To the girl who tried to feel my banana in Retreat Lane last
week - all is forgiven, and I hope you bring the watermelon
next time.
Dierdre - you're the most interesting girl I've ever known. I'd
love to show you my collection of writing paper watermarks,
and afterwards we could watch paint dry together - Andy.
Paul, I love you. Do you hear me - I love you! I really love
you. I just love you, alright. Don't argue about it. I love you.
No really, I love you. Blimey, some people. Derek.
Jason, I've been cleaning your room now for months now, but
I'd really like to clean you inside out. I'll be waiting with my
hoover appliance - Dot.
Lee - Footstools brought us together, but an archaeopteryx tore
us apart At least I've still got my Dragoon Guards. Strange
Sally.
Bertrand -
Will you quell my existential angst, and we can co-exist
together in subjective reality. Love, Ludwig.
Penelope - You're a bit of alright, love. Sid.
PS - Just thought you'd like to know, like.
Cilla, be my valentine - Peter.
Boris - We met at the International Burping Championships and
you've put the wind up me ever since. Yours, Maggie.
No Cilla, be my valentine! - Brian.
Victoria - Let's amuse ourselves together. From another raving
old queen - Quentin.
Don't listen to them Cilla - it's me you want! - Dave.
Cynthia, I'm installing my new chair-lift this afternoon; can I
take you for a ride? - Bemard.
To Peter, Brian and Dave,
My first question is this: if you were a piece of household
electrical equipment, what would you be? - Cilla.
Ever since we fell in love with ourselves, we've determined
never to share our love with any other college - Wentworth.
Ermintrude -
You're really homy and I love you more than all the udders -
Daisy.
PS - Let's go on a package holiday to France together.
Packs of 20 assorted Valentines cards available in the SU Shop
today!
Aaardvark